It is the height of the Green Season and the Seekers are beginning to gather blueberries and raspberries, the first of our many native fruits to ripen. Along with gathering all of their greens and some fruit, several Seekers are getting good at fishing. One caught 40 fish before breakfast, which provided her clanmates with a tasty meal that day. Ant hunting is also going well, particularly with Rose, who has a trapline that includes a number of anthills. She comes back to camp with quite the quantity of sweet-tasting larvae. They’re high in fat and very nourishing. In our Insect Workshop, the Seekers learned that ants like to bring their larvae up near the surface to gather warmth. All that’s needed to gather them is to lay a thin piece of bark on top of an anthill, and the ants will bring their larvae up under it. Then come by every few suns, lift the bark, and scoop up the larvae.

Cedar and Wolfgang pose as trees in our Lostproofing workshop.

We hope all of you had a good time reading Alex’s story of getting back to Nishnajida from his Dead Moon Visit. He ended up walking an extra five miles that day, and made it back to camp just before dark. Several other people have gotten lost while out gathering and exploring, but none as long as Alex. Their stories kicked off the Lostproofing Workshop, giving us some real-life examples to work with. Everyone’s attention was riveted, as there is not a person who doesn’t have some fear of getting lost. We shared methods of direction finding without map and compass, and which did not rely on the sun—which is actually not very reliable if clouds move in.

Seekers pose as trees to aid in our Lostproofing Workshop.

They learn how trees, streams, hillsides, ground vegetation, wind direction, and several other natural features tell direction. Equally as important, they learned how to stay calm centered, and aware when you are lost, and to trust in with the Earth, rather than what your head, is telling you.

Meetings happen regularly at camp–it’s important to make sure communication skills are a focus.

We also had two workshop on Truthspeaking. Talking circles and meetings have been happening regularly at camp, focusing mainly on parenting styles and food/foraging topics. Many were concerned about these meetings often dragging out and being nonproductive. To improve communication and conflict resolution skills, we devoted the first Truthspeaking workshop to learning how to separate feelings from thoughts. An example we used was, “I’m angry because there weren’t any nuts left for me.” That is not a clear statement because it will not necessarily meet the needs of the speaker. She might receive empathy in response to her anger, yet the issue remains unresolved. Someone might rescue her by giving her nuts, and again the core issue remains unresolved. Neither of these approaches addresses the core issue, which could be fear, a sense of rejection, or even guilt for not letting her needs be known before she left. Nor do the approaches help the person to help herself. Instead, she could be learning to use anger to get her needs met. Additionally, her disempowerment sets the stage for the clan taking action without being informed of her needs.

Another approach would be for her to separate her feelings from the issue at hand, and to address both separately. She could say, “I’m angry. I don’t have any nuts to eat—it seems there were none left for me. Now I’m hungry; does anyone know where my nuts are?” She has expressed her feelings first, and then she addressed the issue by asking directly for help. This small but remarkable shift in expression helped her take responsibility for her feelings rather than blaming them on others and triggering reactiveness, which often gets in the way of getting needs met. Now, without emotions creating distance between her and the clan, they can together work on the issue.

Crafting, truthspeaking, truthlistening.

The second Truthspeaking workshop was dedicated to learning how to communicate in meetings. Listening, the first item on the agenda, is a key component to creating circle consciousness during meetings. When everyone is able to listen from the heart, one person can speak and each and every person hears it for what it is. The person’s spoken awareness is everyone’s awareness.  When we are not able to listen, we continually need to be told, and the speaker feels a continual need to repeat himself. This often leads to frustration, entrenchment, and the taking of sides.

The second agenda item was on how to speak so that I will be heard. When I am clear, succinct, and straightforward, I only need to speak once and my message is received.

The kids just want to play.

The Truthspeaking workshops were effective—meetings are gradually becoming shorter, less divisive, and more productive. Yet one issue persisted: the presence of toddlers, who were disruptive to the meeting because they were not getting their needs met by adults who could not be present for them. One child in particular was persistent in going around the circle trying to get attention. First you try to initiate play by teasing the adults with a stick; and when that didn’t work, he resorted to taking things from people and walking away with them.

Several adults grew frustrated and reacted in ways that frustrated the child as well. He resorted to whining and tantrums, and after several meetings of this, the issue became a meeting topic. We explored why children whine. “Take a look at him taking things from others,” said Tamarack, “why is he doing this?” Tamarack offered for the Seekers to think about games for a moment: what is the basis of most games (and ballgames are a good example) is to take something from one person and give it to someone else, or put it somewhere else. All this child wanted to do was play a typical game. So what’s left is to figure out how to create a win-win situation— the child playing a game and the adults having their meeting.

Hakar puts his nutshells away–children especially are connected to place.

At first the group decided to have someone take the child away from the hearth and play with him. It worked for a while, until he wanted to wander back and be closer to Mom. The circle then began to recognize that children, especially small children, are connected with place—their world is small. The group then decided to leave the hearth and have their meetings a little farther off. This left the little one and his playmates a place that is comfortable and familiar to them. It worked: we now have contented children and happy adults.

The Rainbow’s woodland home.

Many of you have asked about the Rainbows and their time away from the main camp. They left because they had a disagreement with a couple of people in the clan, and they wanted to take some time to reflect. They did this with the consent and support of their circle and the guides. They’re doing well in their temporary camp: the Guides spend time with them regularly and the children come back to the main camp at Wabanong every day to play. Additionally, the Rainbows’ camp is not terribly isolated—it’s close enough to share a canoe landing with the Guardian camp at Zhaawanong.

The Seekers are looking forward to next few suns, especially to the upcoming Weather Forecasting workshop and the beginning of hide tanning. With the next post you’ll hear more about their progress toward shared parenting and the evolution of the children’s culture. What a joy it is to watch them both blossom side-by-side!

To all of you have written blog comments and well wishes to the Seekers, many have gotten a chance to read them finally—now is their Dead Moon Visit—and their next one is a moon from now. In this post, we’re going to explain a few of the traditions of the Wilderness Guide Program, including the Dead Moon Visit, to help everyone with family and friends out at camp to understand more about the Wilderness Guide Program’s unique aspects and how it works.

You may have already noticed that we use untypical words for the passage of time, like sun for day, quarter moon for a week, moon for the 29 day lunar cycle, along with quarter moon, meal time, and egg roast for shorter periods of time. From the moment the Seekers step foot in the forest, they begin the process of tuning into their environment. Discovering first-hand what it is to be a creature of the Earth, they look to her to keep track of time’s passing, rather than relying on the clock. They connect their inner concept of time directly to the environment they inhabit.  Even though there are no timepieces in the forest, not even man-made sundials, we still carry clocks in our heads.  To help support the transition to earth time, we use terms that reflect the new relationship. Tamarack’s recent blog post, Beyond Clock and Calendar, addresses the topic and discusses the benefits, along with offering examples.

The Dead Moon Visit is a Teaching Drum Wilderness Guide Program tradition that the Seekers are newly initiated into. Every new moon, which we call the dead moon because there is no moon to light the night sky, the Seekers will hike in to Nadmadewening , or Nad’mad, which is the main campus, to call family and friends, e-mail, and do research in the school library (there are no books at camp). They also stock up on supplies and necessary gear. Four groups will be coming in on successive suns, in order to give everyone adequate time on phone and computer. You can watch the moon, just as the Seekers do, to tell when they are coming in.

We’ve put up a new page on the blog called the Glossary of Terms, which includes many of the words used at camp that you may not be familiar with. You’ll find English terms used for communicating and time reckoning, as well as Ojibwe words the Seekers use as part of their immersion in the local ecosystem and culture. We’ll post some of their original terms as well. Language is fluid and ever evolving, so they are encouraged to come up with their own terms for units of time, the names of animals and plants, and even each other. In doing so, they develop a sense of ownership in their language and a relationship with what they name. Their communication takes on a new relevance, probably similar to the experience of those who first came to this land and constructed their language based on their growing connection with this special place on the Earth’s bosom.

Gigawaabamen! (Yep, you’ll  find it in the glossary.)

Right now, amphibians of all kinds are out sunning themselves, singing, eating bugs, and generally having a grand time. They are an important part of the ecosystem here, helping to control insects and provide food for animals from snakes to bears, not to mention larger members of their own kind.  Although frogs may be small, the Seekers follow in the footsteps of the Natives by not snubbing their noses at them. Many Native peoples subsisted more on small animals such as frogs which were caught by women and children, than on large game. After a workshop on frog hunting—in fact, right after—the Seekers went out and put their new knowledge to practice. Taking their cues from Heron, a master frog stalker, they became proficient in no time. And they got a lesson in respectful hunting.

In the workshop, they were informed of poisonous species and given guidelines for determining when frogs can be gathered without interfering with their life cycles. The frog chorus at this time of year is unimaginably loud. Why? Because they are mating. The Seekers learned how to identify species who have already laid their eggs and can thus be collected, and how to identify those who have not yet reproduced. Frogs species breed in order through the season, from small to medium to large. If they’re calling, they’re mating—so leave them be. Additionally, the Seekers learned which species are rare and protected, and how to tell if a species has an adequate enough population to safely hunt them.

The Seekers came back with 25 frogs, and every single one of them was a female full of eggs, which they found out only after they had killed and cleaned them. It was a sad day, and a potent lesson, as frogs only live 1-2 turns of the seasons, and those 25 were given no chance to reproduce. The most potent lessons often come at a cost, and this one about disrupting a fragile ecosystem’s life cycle will not likely be forgotten anytime soon.

And then there are the lessons being learned from venturing outside of their social and emotional comfort zones. The Seekers are now moving from isolated nuclear-family units toward clan-based extended family. Even though this is what they have been looking for and desiring to create, it is a difficult transition to make. Different, often-conflicting parenting styles are tossed together, creating turmoil for parents and children alike. Right now we’re working with three fundamentally different parenting styles:

1. The child acts out to manipulate the parents, and the parents placate the child so she’ll discontinue the behavior. This leaves the child in charge and the parents at her mercy. Parents end up feeling victimized, and children are left in control of situations they are not capable of managing.
2. The parents give the child choices, all of which the parent has predetermined are acceptable. The child feels content and empowered by being part of the decision-making process. With the parents  guiding rather than imposing, the child is able to learn decision-making skills and the effects of choices.
3. The parents control the child, often making decisions for the child without her input. The child usually grows passive and dependent upon the parent or develops a rebellious pattern.

All three of these styles can come into play in any parent-child relationship over the course of time. When one style dominates a parent-child relationship, it can be highly uncomfortable for both if another style is used with the child by other adults. Along with confusion, there can be defensiveness, anger, shame, and guilt.

However, the opportunity to live together sun after sun, coupled with a strong desire to work through parenting issues in order to create an open, clan-based relationship where parenting is shared, have moved some parents to make changes. They have gained tremendous insight , not to mention the relief and renewed energy they have for their relationships with their children. One couple with a 2½ year old were struggling with their child’s behavior during dinner. His bowl had broken and he had to use a smaller bowl. He rebelled every time, and the three of them struggled while the entire circle’s meal was disrupted.

With suggestions from a couple of the guides, they came to see that there were other options than what they had always done. They chose a number of things to do as a circle to help empower him. First, the most important thing was to switch the serving order so that the smaller children went directly after elders with their mothers. They also switched the mealtime to much earlier in the day, so that the small children are not so tired.  They gave him a bigger bowl, and it was decided that all children need to take a small amount of every dish served. Then, they could decide which pot they wanted more from. Empowering! He was given the option to walk from server to server and get his own portions, like everyone else does. He was given small servings, to encourage him to finish his bowl like everyone else before going for seconds.

There was an immediate change in his demeanor: he was happy to get his own food, and he sat and ate it with everyone else with none of the fuss. Mom felt instant relief and enjoyed watching her little one take care of himself.  When there are questions about what he chooses to feed himself, he is given acceptable options that encourage him to make his own decisions rather than having them made for him.

Now he even has his own little knife, and he delights in helping to scale fish with it. This family is an example of what’s possible—radical change can happen with just a few modifications that help our children thrive and at the same time lovingly embrace them. Empowering changes can be made anywhere at any time; children usually respond pretty quickly. In a clan situation such as ours, the parents can discuss and come to agreement on options, and then parent together. This is the clan way—working with one voice for the benefit of all involved.

Adults engage in the same patterns with each other as they do with their children, but they are often more subtle. We can look at our relationship with our children as a metaphor for how we treat ourselves and each other. How often do we not offer ourselves choices and back ourselves into corners without even realizing it? Even though we might see instant results with children, changes to treat ourselves with respect and follow through consistently with our children can take time and require continual effort. As they say, old habits die hard. Although the couple we just talked about has made a huge change around meals, the shift will have to sift through every area of their parenting. This takes the support of others, which is one of the beauties of clan living. And in return, the couple and their child are a shining example and inspiration for their entire circle.

Adding to the mix recently is Wilderness Guide Program graduate Annika, who is here to join the family yearlong for an entire moon. She is the first of a number of graduates who will be coming to help support the yearlong this turn of the seasons. We’re very much looking forward to other alumni coming to share their experience and passion with the Seekers who make up this very special clan at Nishnajida.